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Body Language…Understand it, Use it, Master it - PART II

Posted by J Kel

This article was submitted by Heine Nzumafo

Continued from ..... Body Language…Understand it, Use it, Master it - PART I

If seated, a woman will typically have arranged herself in such a way that her foot and hands are directed toward the man she is interested in. She may also present her neck to him, inclining her head at an angle to expose the neck. If you picture this correctly, you should notice that her eyes are not in direct contact with his. Several grooming gestures can also reveal her interest. The classic application of lipstick is a common example of a grooming gesture that implies interest and one that is reported to be arousing by up to 80% of men. Ever wonder why a woman across the room suddenly begins to file her nails? It may not be directed at you, but it is directed at someone she’s drawn to, whether she knows it or not! Another example that can be quite literally revealing is the slight hiking up of the skirt. A woman may do this quite involuntarily and direct it at the object of her interest. If another man's attention is attracted inadvertently, she may quite suddenly pull her skirt back down, possibly followed by a pouting gesture.

During conversation a woman will have a very open body posture with someone she finds appealing, and a closed one if not, possibly folding her arms or otherwise blocking the undesired attention. In a favorable situation she will maintain eye contact, lean forward, and nod or shake her head in agreement with what is being said to her. She may use exaggerated hand gestures, especially an open presentation of her palms as she speaks. My favorite is licking of the lips. A woman will seldom lick her lips if she is not interested, the more she does it, the more interested she is!

A wide range of cues ranging from incidental contact, to intentional caressing may also occur. Tapping of the forearm is typical of this incidental, though not accidental contact. If she smokes, she may ask for a light. If she drinks, she may ask for a drink or another drink. Both indicate desire to keep your presence. The 'breast touch' is a very overt type of this sort of contact, whereby a woman deliberately contacts a man with her breasts. She may just tap him on the back or shoulder as she passes, but the contact with her breasts as she passes is intended to titillate. (No pun intended) Sometimes this contact lasts for several minutes at a time. Foot to foot contact, as well as knee touches and thigh contact are also common. Those work well in tight areas like clubs or if you two know each other reasonably well. A woman’s level of comfort with you and of course interest, will dictate how touchy she gets with you.

You may think while reading this that only a fool would miss these blatant and obvious clues that a woman was interested in him. But remember, there may also be a campaign of misinformation running concurrently. The verbal information stream may well mask what the body language is saying. We have a tendency to be more perceptive of other people's failure to read these obvious signals, being removed from the obligation to maintain the verbal part of the exchange ourselves. We've probably all missed these cues before and been told so by a friend, or had to tell a friend the same. Besides, we spend a great deal of our time exploring “dead ends”. Use body language from the start, and you will have no dead ends!