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Posted by J Kel |
This article was submitted by Heine Nzumafo
continued from .... What Men And Women Lie About - Part I
In today’s world, gender specific roles are just not practical. Clear cut practices of definition only add strain and stress on both partners while reducing the potential and productivity of the couple. Teamwork generates more productivity and today, couples need to work together as flexibly and with as much overlap as possible. They should compliment each other as well. When men have values that degrade, disrespect, disregard women, it is impossible for women to be fulfilled anywhere, be it the kitchen, living room or bedroom. Such men often think having a wife solves many domestic problems. In other words, wives are domestics, personal assistants and child bearers all in one. In fact, they believe they offer a lot to a woman, the opportunity to have a man because marriage to them is an accomplishment for women. They expect more than 100% yet offer nothing in return. Such men will never think about cooking or treating their women to anything special or pleasing.
What a simple claim! If a man can heat it up in the kitchen he can heat it up in the bedroom. Now let’s go to the bedroom. Many men do not consider women at all as far as that goes. They roll off and snore a few minutes after, then wake up later and wonder why you are still awake or how come it is you are not sleeping. To them a woman’s satisfaction should result from their own satisfaction. Sex to them is something that she does as a responsibility and obligation to him. Not surprising then, that their ears and eyes are closed to indications and suggestions that could enhance the pleasures of their women. They may even perceive a sexually liberated woman to be promiscuous and immoral. Would you be surprised if such a man tells you he does not and will not cook?
I challenge anyone to tell me of a man who can cook yet shares such views. On second thought, I take that back because I had mentioned earlier, there are some that cook but only due to circumstances beyond their control, not because of their views towards women and relationships. These men are more likely to be inhibited, inconsiderate, unobservant and selfish as many other old fashioned men.
My position is an open one. I won’t say every man should cook or know how to cook. I’d rather say they should reflect on the differences between present day society and those of yester years that thrived on gender defined roles. Cooking alone does nothing. Mentality does everything. So men, if you do not know how to cook, don’t go purchasing cookery books or taking lessons. That alone will not help your bedroom performance and skills. Ladies, please, next time you get approached by a man, don’t ask him if he knows how to cook…at least not immediately. It by itself is and never will be a complete indicator. You have to look past the surface.
Observation is crucial, for both men and women. Women observe and listen carefully. You do not have to taste a man’s cooking or share a bed before you know what type he is. So do not jump into conclusions that would rush you into future regrettable positions. Most women like men who cook, they would agree. So men, observe and learn to please your woman, in more ways than cooking can. You may be surprised how success in one area feeds another.
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