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Posted by J Kel |
This article was submitted by Heine Nzumafo
continued from .... What Men And Women Lie About - Part I
Another lie I find particularly interesting comes when men and women are both asked how many sex partners they have had. If I ask you now, how many partners have you had, what will your response be? Think about it. If what you thought was a lie, you just lied to yourself. But the interesting thing about these lies is that, they are what we really want to believe. It’s easy to smile now, because you have been asked this before. Why will a man claim to have had sex with 20 women, when in fact he’s been with far less than that? Because in his mind he’s saying “well, lady A spent the night, she wanted it, but she said No – I’ll include her to the list anyway because we made out all night.” Or he may think, “with lady B, we kiss and make out all the time, we just haven’t had the chance to do it, but it will come some day, so I’ll count her too” All this in a bid to increase his image as an experienced partner and lover.
Women, you know what you all say. How many men have you had sex with? If the right answer is 10 her answer may be 3. Now dare asking her how many boyfriends she has had. You guessed right! The answer is also 3. Now tell me ladies, why does the number of boyfriends often correspond to the number of partners when we all know that’s not always the case? The minds of women do a lot of filtering. “Oh! One night stands don’t count” or “we only dated for a month”, and they are serious about it too! But these are viable reasons to them, just so they can avoid being judged as immoral or indecent or promiscuous.
Oh! And while you are at it, try asking her the last time she got some. Then ask her the last time she was in a relationship. Same answer! So it’s often 6 months, 1 year or even more. This make it seam as though women abstain from sex longer than men do. Or don’t engage in sex outside of relationships. I don’t think it is necessarily so, because you women know, when hormones kick in around that time of the month you had better be away from your greatest temptation. But sometimes many would admit to casual encounters, but even when she does, she’s not going to tell you yesterday, it would be a month ago. Men do the exact opposite. A man will claim to have had same last night just because he had a wet dream. They might tell stories and brag to their boys about the whole incident that never happened. But it did in his mind, because he protracted the events of the first date to end with sex just because he was surprised she kissed him goodbye. Just the thought of optimism, is cause for assumption.
I’m sure there are many other lies you and I can come up with, but I need not delve for more. I might get boring to some people while those who are guilty of telling such lies might break from reading in denial and defense. Either way I am glad some of us can see how similar we men and women are in all our differences, and how different we are in our similarities. It helps to understand both, and even more to not stereotype the individuals we encounter. We are all unique in our own right, and even though patterns may exist in the grand scheme of things, we may be the exception. Generalities serve best as perspective and not judgment. In my opinion, there is no need to lie irrespective of the truth. In fact, it may actually help you in the weeding-out process because the right person for you will accept you for who you are and what you have done in the past – who knows, they actually might be looking for that! So if a person can’t stand the truth about you, smile, because you don’t need them anyway.
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